How OCD Kills Your Soul

“Step on a crack, break your mama’s back.”  “He loves me.” Pluck. “He loves me not.”  Pluck.  Magical thinking mired in the realm of the concrete.  The quest to pin down certainty in this ever flowing, changing universe.  Perhaps it’s because we have bodies that we are so prone to do this.  If we were wind or rain we might more easily accept the ephemeral nature of Being.

OCD, aka, obsessive compulsive disorder, is living by the numbers.  It is an attempt to solidify life and so defy the ever changing order of things into a calculus that is tangible and manageable.  The mystery of life is reduced to numbers that you can manipulate, jars you can line up, corners you can sweep, calories you can calculate, money you can collect, germs you can eradicate.  Lulled for the moment by laborious incantations and machinations, you are safe and in control in your carefully constructed castle of dust free numbers and carefully placed jars.

If you suffer from this dis-ease, you know that your castle of certainty requires constant monitoring and vigilance. You also know at your core that it is soulless work and interferes with your relationships, creativity and freedom.

We are creatures of ritual.  Our rituals can either bind us to the concrete world or can lift us beyond into the energetic.  Rituals that include meditation and yoga provide access to the energetic world and thus can be utilized to enhance, rather than deaden, the soul.  The body and the world of the material, seductive as they are, serve only as access points, not  end points.  The beautiful statue of a Goddess or meditating for exactly 20 minutes a day are merely doorways or pointers.  This is where we get confused and where the OCD-ers among us get trapped within the walls of a rigid, rule bound maze. When you step outside the worn trail of your everyday habits and tap on the solid door of your castle, the door dissolves into space, revealing a new realm of possibility and life. You already are in possession of the cheese.  You just need to stop, notice and savor.

 

 

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